Occasional ramblings

You're an idiot, and I can prove it!

2012-01-17T19:13:00.000-08:00

What is it about religion that makes otherwise intelligent people behave like imbeciles?

Although I shouldn't be, I'm constantly astonished at the contorted word play theists revert to whilst attempting to validate and support their belief system, as the following exchange shows:

Christopher Hitchens.

2011-12-16T21:37:00.000-08:00

Christopher Hitchens, amongst all the rational voices which comprise the "new" atheism, was the one who was most responsible for encouraging me to find my own voice as a freethinking anti-theist.

I was deeply saddened by the news of Hitch's passing, and for a while the tears came, but then I realised that what I was sad about was selfish. I was weeping for the passing of a man whose time I FELT hadn't come yet, when, in fact, I should have been chortling with laughter and celebrating the life of a man who, quite clearly, lived on his own terms.

Christopher Eric Hitchens, you will be missed, but more importantly, you will be celebrated.

Rest well my friend.

New Atheism? Really?

2011-07-09T20:07:00.000-07:00

I hear this term bandied around by acquaintances, friends and the media in general, but what EXACTLY is it they're all whining about?

Let's keep it simple by first defining both words:

1) New

–adjective

of recent origin, production, purchase, etc.; having but lately come or been brought into being: a new book.

of a kind now existing or appearing for the first time; novel: anew concept of the universe.

having but lately or but now come into knowledge: a newchemical element.

2) Atheism

–noun

the doctrine or belief that there is no god.

disbelief in the existence of a supreme being or beings.

Right, now I've got that out of the way, let's take an objective look at what's really going on.

In claiming that any of this is "new", as social conservatives so often do, the claim belies the fact that non-believers have been around at least as long as religion, and indeed, given our rather skeptical nature, I'd argue that non-belief has existed far longer than religion, as humans needed to first invent religion, and as history clearly shows, invention takes effort where skepticism takes none.

Conjecture notwithstanding, even a cursory sprint online reveals that documented non-belief started as far back as the 5th century BCE, but the opponents to this argument will, no doubt, take issue as source of this non-belief comes from a non-Western tradition, so I'll side-step the issue and point to the roots of The Age of Enlightenment which took hold in the mid-1600's which, I'm sure you WILL agree, is still hardly new.

The 1600's were a strange time, with various members of various ennobled families supporting rational enquiry which lead to people like Spinoza, Locke, Newton, Diderot and Voltaire laying the foundation for further development. However, after this all-too-brief glimmer of reason, religion managed to re-tighten its grip on humanity's throat, where it has largely enjoyed privileged status until the present time, so much so, perhaps, that in the United States, under Regan, Bush the Elder and certainly Bush the Shrub, it became "normal" to espouse faith when seeking election to public office.

However, I suspect the real reason for the backlash against the term is two-fold:

1) The "new" in "New Atheism", has arisen because the media loves anything "new", e.g. red is the new black, 60 is the new 40, conformity is the new individualism etc., yet this cheapens the majesty of advancement which has lead to the current state of scientific enquiry
- but more importantly -
2) Religion is finding itself increasingly under observation and being held to account for its actions, or indeed inactions, in compliance with the laws and edicts of this, a very temporal world. Which, of course, flies in the face of any institution trying to impose their world view upon an increasingly secular society.

In identifying this position, I believe I've found the soft, bloated, boy-loving, closeted, white, male middle-aged under belly of religion, which needs to be kicked as hard, and often as possible, until soundly whipped.

What do you think?

New Atheism, Really?

Tolerance, no more.

2011-01-16T00:46:00.000-08:00

It occurred to me today that this theme of tolerance, so often bandied about by the media, liberals and politicians, is quite likely to be the un-doing of our western, industrialised society. Allow me to explain.

As many great thinkers of the modern era have noted, religion has been given a free pass when it comes to almost everything for roughly the last 2000 years (depending on the religion of course). In so doing, the rhetoric of sanity that's usually employed to dispel myth and reveal the absurdities of organisations purporting some "secret knowledge" has been withheld, and consequently we find ourselves on the tipping point between a way of life that embraces all the forward motion of education and the sciences, but which can't seem to shirk the vestigial tail of religion.

If you peruse any daily rag, one finds many column inches dedicated to the domain of horoscopes, astrological wafflings, and publicising so called balanced viewpoints by including ecumenical commentary on domestic and foreign policy, but why should this be the case when clearly there's not one jot of evidence to support these positions. Furthermore, the preserve of religion in all forms of media, as some sacred cow that can't be butchered, mystifies me. Again, no evidence to support a belief structure that predates modernity by several thousand years, and which remains entirely irrelevant in a modern context, yet still these institutions are allowed a voice.

The problem with all of this lies less with the application of the mealy-mouthed forms of "mainstream" religion which permeate Australia, but at the lunatic fridge of them all. For it's these extremes which threaten our way of life, and which the liberal elements within society, in the name of equality and tolerance perhaps, have permitted to flourish when, by rights, they should have been exposed for the frauds they so clearly are.

In naming liberals as part of the problem, I'm expecting to be reprimanded for being intolerant, but before posting a knee jerk reaction, stop to think about the lunatic fringe of Christianty, Judaism, Islam and all other religion that threatens peace the world over.

I look forward to your commentary.

Alex.

Humanism - Not strong enough?

2011-01-02T19:59:00.000-08:00

What is it about this term that lacks the fundamental weight to compel us to organise under its banner?

Well, to someone like me who has ADHD, life is a mostly overwhelmingly complex affair, and to make any sense of it, an enormous amount of effort and critical thought must be brought to bear on a huge range of subjects that confront me everyday. Luckily, since I have the benefit of a decent education, a natural yen to question everything I encounter, as well as both copious organisational tools and the benefits of Ritalin (thanks science), most of the time I'm able to accomplish these tasks in a way that has allowed me to largely dictate the terms of my own life, to a good degree of success by any measure.

Yet, in contrast to my own experience, the theist (who most likely came to their religion through indoctrination as a child, or by some life shaking event that lead them on a religious path), has chosen a pre-packaged lifestyle that requires the adherent to actively suspend the higher faculties of logic and reason, instead accepting on blind faith a world view that gives them a central rallying point around which to form opinion.

I suspect it is the amount of work required that leads people to choose an overly simplistic rallying point, as opposed to circling their wagons around the humanist camp, and given this I also suspect that even if people were to grasp just how amazing their life could be in becoming truly free thinking humanists, the vast majority would still choose a path of ignorance as it requires a good deal of effort. So how do we change this dynamic?

In the western world the key to all of this is a comprehensive secular education which places paramount importance of delivery of mathematics and science curricula to students, yet the same can not be said of the Islamic world, as clearly indicated by the educational levels of the 9/11 participants. At what level secular society can engage Islam I'm at a loss to know, since Islam is an entirely fundamental religion that tolerates no secular thought. (Think of the results for apostasy, if you don't believe me.)

If, as a growing body of scientific experts contend, there is an evolutionary need for "belief" deep seated in our genetic make up, then the only way we can devolve the myth of religion is by teaching it, as with all the other dead religions, in a comparative study class, and similarly religious texts must be shown in their proper light, as poorly written works of fiction, through their introduction and discussion in a comparative literature class, but in neither case must religion be presented as fact since there's absolutely no evidence to support such a claim.

While this fight will not be an easy on, for indeed that's what this is, a fight to increase the spread of reality, it is of paramount importance that we engage wholeheartedly now, or else risk the destruction of our species.

As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts, so feel free to comment.

Happy 2011!

Attention Deficit Disorder

2010-12-28T15:49:00.000-08:00

It's a time for reflection on the year that nearly was.

When I think back over the past twelve months, I divide the year in to good, bad and indifferent moments. Thankfully, there are more good moments than bad (or truly awful) but largely the year seems, in retrospect, to be indifferent for the most part. So in an effort to stave off the inevitable blues that set in around this time of year, (thanks Mum and Jana for that), I've decided to re-read "Driven to Distraction" - the ADD "bible" if you will, and send copies to my Mum, who both thinks I'm making all this ADD stuff up and who also still refuses to believe there's even a family of disorders relating, what used to be called "minimal brain dysfunction", and my step-Dad, who thankfully is rather more enlightened than my Mum.

I suppose in giving a voice to this wonderful neurological ailment, which is actually classified as a disability under the Americans with Disabilities Act, I'm permanently outing myself to the parental units in the hope that they'll better understand why my childhood was so painful, and why, as an adult, my life has been so atypical.

With this in mind, which in my case is drastically different at a chemical and neurological level than most people, I hope that 2011 will have me expunging things that have been holding me back, and setting attainable goals for the year that will lay the foundations for a more successful future that sees me looking after me, rather than trying to rescue people.

Anyway, on that somewhat positive note, I'll wish you all a very peaceful and satisfying 2011.

Mumbo Jumbo, Hocus Pocus, and nailing people to bits of wood.

2010-12-03T22:17:00.000-08:00

Ok, dear friends, what is it, pray tell, that makes seemingly rational people believe in the super natural?

As near as I can figure, it's one of two things:

1) The theist is brain washed from birth by parents who believe.
2) A person comes to religious belief because some trauma in their life caused them to loose control, and instead of finding the root cause and fixing it, they chose the easiest option, god.

For those of you who believe, I'd like to know how you came to be a theist, and for those who don't, why not?

More theist nonsense from Facebook. Enjoy!

2010-11-30T00:46:00.000-08:00

Justin Sutton
‎@ Alex, well, somehow you became a facebook friend of mine and you really don't know me at all and I find it kinda of sad that you would be so hell bent "excuse the metaphor" on not just classifying all people of faith as mentally dysfunctional, you also make ridiculous assumptions about my character that are truly stupid. You don't know me at all yet you are trying to paint your own mental picture of what kind of 'Three Stepper' I might be... are you homophobic or do you just like to insult people at random? To the point of your argument, you can do nothing to prove there is NO GOD, other than form your personal opinion, but all I have to do is be alive and contemplate existence of not just my life but of all "Creation" which is used to define ALL that is in the Universe and see that proof of a Creator is in creation itself therefore everywhere. While you make your argument that there is no proof of god, but you acknowledge the existence of the Universe, you with all your rational powers can't seem separate your emotional disdain for the faithful from your irrational argument that while you behold existence of creation you can not admit the existence of a creator which is a rational failure on your part. To reiterate my point, the proof of the creator is everywhere, and you are betting your short time on this earth on an irrational argument that while you can behold creation there is no creator. I suggest you think again... Further, as a man of 42 years of age with several decades of theological and historic study, I had the opportunity to go through the "Bronze Age Paperback" as you call it with a great deal of focus using audio tapes and concordance and analysis of the Nag Hamadi and other ancient writings and I find it evident that you are ignorant of the wisdom, collectively and individually outlined in careful detail in the collective wisdom of mankind as told in the Bible and elsewhere. What you need is wisdom and a new purpose in life other than trying to heap shit on people who have invested a great amount of time to know God when you clearly have not... if you had, you would not be such a negative and faithless homophone. Certainly it is clear that more people have been slaughtered in the name of God by false profits and opportunists, this is clear to all history and I will be the first to call out the religious radicals who are guilty of the slaughter of the innocent, but I am not such a fool as to pretend like you do that all faithful people are just idiots with a mental problem.
15 hours ago ·
Alex McCarthy
Just so we're clear about the following:

1) You added me
2) Homophobic? Sorry, did I ever use this word, call you gay, or insult homosexuals? That's your own subconscious talking.
3) I'm amazed that if you have studied theology, you'd still be rattling on trying to support your position using a creation/creator argument.
4) "...the collective wisdom of mankind as told in the bible and elsewhere...". What, you mean wisdom like it's ok to own slaves and kill people when they work on the Sabbath. If that's wisdom you can keep it.
5) Homophone? You might want to check that one.
6) As someone who supports a belief in the supernatural, it's your job to provide proof of the supernatural, not mine. As an atheist, someone who rejects the idea of any form of higher power, I need to provide no proof, since I'm rejecting the claim.
7) Your religion is killing people, and by supporting your religion you are endorsing that killing.

I'll stand by my assertion that religion is a mental illness. If I told you I talked to an invisible friend, you'd think me eccentric, but if I told you my invisible friend made magic things happen for me, you'd think I was nuts, or at the very least recommend I get some counselling.

If you're going to run for public office, or spout opinions about a Bronze Age belief system, and expect to be taken seriously by the 15% of the American public who, like me, have freed themselves from dogmatic slavery, guess again.
14 hours ago ·
Alex McCarthy
Just with regard to my point #4, you might like to have read of this link:

http://groups.google.com/group/talk.atheism/browse_thread/thread/7484a16fcd380fd9/9e722af8c4f85e26?lnk=raot

Once, again, for someone who claims to have studied the subject and who professes a belief, you seem remarkably uninformed.
A few seconds ago ·

Facebook strikes again!

2010-11-22T07:59:00.000-08:00

I've spent a long time contemplating the vastness of the universe, and my own brief, blink in to and out of existence, and the conclusion that any rational person would reach is that while science hasn't yet provided every answer about the origins of this universe, we're inching ever closer, and none of this discovery has anything to do with religion, spirituality or any other label you'd care to place upon it. Indeed, just imagine, if you can, how much further along the path towards the enlightenment humanity would have been WITHOUT religion trying to stop the march forward.

As someone who used to live in the US, I can honestly say, it's not until you've lived abroad that you really begin to see the madness that belies theists in America, and indeed throughout the world, regardless of what their religious persuasion might be.

At the risk of running on like a broken record, where's the proof for your all powerful creator, or am I to assume, as with so many other theists, you're taking all this on faith, or "supporting" your "evidence" by citing a flimsy, heavily edited, Bronze Age paperback?

Furthermore, why is it that theists are always banging on about the sanctity of the unborn, and how every life is sacred, but they're apparently fine sending teenagers off to die in an unjust war in the name of...?

I'm not sure why you ended up a theist, perhaps you were indoctrinated by your parents from birth and therefore never had a chance to form your own opinions, or perhaps you suffered some crisis in your life previously where outside intervention was mandated, (Three Step programmes come to mind, where you replaced one addiction for another), but whatever the reason, if you take an long step back, and look at the evidence, you'll see that humanity is almost exactly the same as every other species that's evolved on this blue green dot. We are born, we exist for some period of time, then we die. It's only because humans are aware of their impending demise that they make up stories to comfort themselves, but these inventions are no more real that you telling me you believe you're Napoleon.

It's time the political paradigm underwent a quantum shift, and theists were given the mental health care they so obviously need. Anyone making claim to have "special knowledge", or a personal relationship with god, would immediately be barred from holding any publicly appointed position.

What is it about faith?

2010-11-03T21:08:00.000-07:00

Well folks,

My pet peeve again, and I'm back this time with an interesting titbit I shared with a friend. Please let me know your thoughts, and feel free to leave comments.

13:01

WOW, so there for the holidays too?>

absolutely

Nice

So will you discuss the true derivation of Xmas?

nope

or that Jesus's birthday is in fact a co-opted pre-christian holiday that Constantine nicked for his new religion?

not interested

Auntie Ostrich

r u talking abt maureen?

Well you AND her now 

so r u

Nah, I've examined all the religions and found them all full of fibs

faith is in the heart, if u keep doing this, examining religions with yr head u're just masturbating w/ yr head, and leaving yr heart empty

kinda wonder if u have a heart at all :))

Not true at all ...

that's why i'm done discussing religion w/ u alex

Logic and emotion are what should drive humanity

it has no purpose whatsoever, just wasting time

Faith requires the active suspension of reason

It's unreasonable to live like that

like u know :))

I do

i hv faith??? in what??

u know why i tell u're a believer of nothing

Faith that religion will be sidelined

even that, i'm not convinced that you're sincere in your belief

How can you believe in nothing?

that's not faith

u tell me

Atheism isn't a "belief"

yes it is

Atheism is the rejection that there's a god

Nope

u believe there's no god, isn't that a belief???

A-theism

same same

No, I reject the belief there's a god

I reject the notion that there's a higher power

No faith required

i know, u told me that

so u believe we're not created on God's image

Your argument says "NOT collecting stamps is a hobby".

Nope

We evolved

u're a result of a decades of evolution

Millions of years of evolution, yes

ergo ur ancesstors were monkeys

(not decades)

Yes

that's where we'll end up

Well, a common ancestor that looked more like a monkey than human sure

i'm created in the image of God, and sad to say, my dear friend Alex came from monkey

there it is

we're done

thanks for playing

Ok, what's your reasoning behind your belief.  Why do you believe that you were created by a god?

(or in the image of a god?)

read the bible, i don't wanna hv endless pointless discussion abt this over & over again

that's faith, and faith is beyond reasoning

but let me ask u this

what's the difference between atheist and communist?

So, you believe because you believe (oh, and I have read the bible, but there's no proof in that)

A-theist someone that rejects the existence of a higher power

that's it?

u think u're all powerful?

wait til Oz got hit by tsunami and u'll see how powerLESS humans r

Communist is someone who believes in a sociopolitical movement that aims for a classless society structured upon communal ownership of the means of production and the end of wage labour and private property.

communists deny God too, no?

Communist defined above

anyway i'm working on something here

As far as what I wrote about atheism, I think you didn't understand...atheists reject the notion that there's a higher power.  By extension, we don't assume we're a higher power, simply that we reject the notion of any kind of deity.  As far as tsunamis go, it's very christian of you to wish that the country I live in gets hit by one, but even so, if that did happen, whilst being tragic, the event would be an entirely natural phenomenon.  No god required.

You really need to understand what I'm trying to say, so we can have a reasonable discussion about this subject without you resorting to "smiting" me.

i'm not smiting u or whatever

Wishing that a tsunami hits the country I live in = smiting

earthquake and calamities are everywhere, whether it's in java or oz, it'll happen without me wishing abt it. who am i to wish for an earthquake that will make it come true

Natural events which are not controlled by you, me or even your god

Therefore if your god doesn't control these events, he's not all powerful and therefore not worth worshiping

He's in control, i'm not (that's what i'm saying)

whether or not you/i worship him, He controls it

Really?

Any proof to support that position?

or just "faith" again?

faith indeed

what's yr faith, alex?

Let's define the word "faith" so we're clear about the meaning, before I tell you...

belief, and for me it's tested already

faith and belief are two different things

a : allegiance to duty or a person : loyalty
b (1) : fidelity to one's promises (2) : sincerity of intentions
2
a (1) : belief and trust in and loyalty to God (2) : belief in the traditional doctrines of a religion
b (1) : firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2) : complete trust
3
: something that is believed especially with strong conviction; especially : a system of religious beliefs <the Protestant faith>

goodness

this is discussion, i wasn't copy pasting anything

Nope, definitions...very important when discussion religion

*discussing

that's why i keep feeling that even yr belief in atheism isn't sincere

Your version of faith is #2 right?

because u keep copy pasting things from somewhere

probably fr the seminars u attended

it's not authentic u

Well, I think it's important to be clear about what we're discussing

And yes, this is all authentic me

i don't get that feel, dear... sorry

Well, you should have faith it's me

cos I'd say the same things to your face

(and have done in person before I think you'll remember)

To use "faith" in a way that defines my meaning, it would be fair to say I have a loyalty to my family and friends

If I said I have faith the sun will come up tomorrow, that would be an unacceptable use of the word, since there's masses of scientific evidence to prove why the sun rises and sets

Therefore the word "faith" is unnecessary

The lies that are religion.

2010-10-28T22:18:00.000-07:00

Indeed it does take courage to speak your mind and live your life according to a set of principles, and far too often the lofty goals we humans set ourselves are simply beyond our ability to achieve, as individuals. However, as a unified force for change, humanity has demonstrated itself clearly capable of conquering the most difficult challenges we set our selves, and none of these accomplishments relates to religion being that unifying force. In fact, quite the opposite.

Religion separates humans at birth, dividing us in to imaginary camps, instead of joining us. Religion preaches that love between two people can only be "right" if it's two people of opposite sexes, when clearly the evidence for same sex relationships is demonstrated time and time again throughout the animal kingdom. Religion says that sex, as a whole, is bad. Why? Religion seeks to influence the judicial system of every country on Earth to benefit itself. Adherents of a particular religious belief routinely kill those who believe in a different higher power in the name of their god. Religion pays no taxes, despite clearly being run as a "for profit" business, and so it has gone for well over two thousand years.

It's time the divisiveness of religion was put away, and the reigns of the enlightenment taken up again to move us all out of an age where Bronze Age beliefs have no say in how we live our day to day lives.

P.S. Just as an adjunct to this, I was watching the lunch time news and saw the saddening reports of the volcano and tsunami in Indonesia, and the hundreds that died. Several questions popped in to my mind: 1) If there really is an all powerful, all knowing god, then why did all those people die? 2) Why is it that, when people die en masse, the religious celebrate the "miraculous" survival of those that didn't die which, by extension, cheapens the lives of those that died. 3) How can christians be right, if muslims and every other sect believes their invisible higher power is the "one true god"?

Why do I hate religion so much?

2010-08-13T20:43:00.000-07:00

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7745088455537169028#

I've often been told I should back down when it comes to my loathing of religion, this by friends and family alike. I'm frequently told personal beliefs should be respected, that I should respect these venerable institutions, and that there's no harm in religion if it brings those who believe comfort. (You'll notice the word "respect" keeps popping up in there). Well folks, it's time for some hard truths, religion is delusion on a massive scale, and institutional religion is more corrupt than BP, Enron, Exxon, Bank of America, Bear Sterns and all the rest tied together. I will not respect anything so corrupt and evil, and if you think I'm exaggerating, then take a moment to watch the video I've linked to, and find out for yourself.

Vatican gaffes - a continuing series.

2010-04-03T16:59:00.000-07:00

Well it's officially official.

After years of denial, cover ups, inter-diocese transfers and the like, it looks like the game's up for the Catholics and their incredibly dodgy leadership, after news outlets throughout the Americas and Europe reported there's a clear paper trail to the top. http://www.groundreport.com/Business/Tracking-the-Papal-Paper-Trail-on-Sex-Abuse/2920957

As if stuffing your own, Gucci shod foot in your mouth wasn't enough, the Vatican attempted to silence its critics by trying to compare church-sanctioned child rape with the Holocaust, and in so doing managed to offend the entire Jewish community, more here: http://www.smh.com.au/world/victims-jewish-groups-slam-vaticans-antisemitism-remarks-20100403-rkb8.html

If, as all these frock wearing paedophiles claim, they're the spokesmen of god, it's a disturbing thought that god has some very kinky sexual proclivities.

It's been a while...

2010-03-16T06:11:00.000-07:00

Ok folks, firstly my sincere apologies for the extremely lengthy delay between postings, but the purchase of a flat, its subsequent gutting and renovation over the holidays left me rather short on time to do anything except scrape layers of brick dusk from my bedding and person. That said, to paraphrase the immortal words of "The Terminator", "I'm baaaack".

I'm going to save the many trials and tribulations of the above for a series of postings yet to come, and concentrate on what's currently buzzing about my overworked cranium; RELIGION!

This past weekend I attended the Global Atheist Convention here in beautiful Melbourne, and you know what folks, we're not alone. Now, you might be thinking "D'uh Alex, of course there are other free thinking, non-believers", but you must understand that after 20 years in the United States, this all came as quite a surprise.

I found myself, on more than one occasion, looking about to see if there was anyone from the evangelical movement loading a rifle or hand gun, waiting to pick off the speakers or attendees. After all, we were all wearing conference passes, resplendent in bold primary colours, marking us as easy targets, but no. Nothing, not a shot, nor a wingnut, only a sole creationist looking forlorn, standing at an exit with his wife and many kids, politely holding a hand made sign. You've got to love this country, don't you?

Can you, for an instant, imagine this taking place in the U.S.? Well, can you? I think you'll agree that the short answer has to be a resounding no.

Can you imagine attending a conference with a room full of fundamental christians, being the sole atheist that stood up to ask a question, and rather than being run out of the room on a rail or worse, being asked to continue speaking by the keynote speaker? The short answer is no, and this, dear readers, is what sets atheists, free thinkers, skeptics and rationalists apart from those they choose to debate.

While this is all fine and dandy, and perhaps elevates us to a slightly higher moral plane, it still shows far too much "respect" for what clearly are delusions of the highest order, so I think it's time that we non-believers accost the rumour mongers, sellers of pabulum, and wholesale guilt merchants, strip away their $3000 suits, shiny, penis shaped hats, frisbee headwear, assorted robes, and the trappings of wealth, and drag them naked, out in the harsh light of reason to account for their actions.

Your thoughts please.

Estate agents in Winter, Melbourne style

2009-08-09T03:31:00.000-07:00

On the path to reconstruction, or is it the path to resurrection I can never remember, I often find myself having to wade through things I've done in the past, only with different accents and cultural backgrounds. That being said, why is it a seemingly universal truth that estate agents are to faeces what lawyers are to pond scum. Case in point, my hunt around Melbourne for a home this weekend.

When an advertisement says something like "partial city views" it actually means, "if you stand on your tiptoes from this exact spot and nowhere else, you can just about make out the absolute top of some high rise building in the city". The suggestion being, of course, that somehow this glimpse of the city will get you laid more often, fatten your wallet, reduce your body fat, add chest muscles, or convert your rusting hulk of a vehicle in to a convertible Ferrari.

Similarly, the words "bargain", "great investment opportunity", or "first time home buyer's dream" conjure images of a tired single fronted Victorian in need of TLC, or a loft that needs conversion, when the reality tends to a flat so small that even Asian mathematicians can't figure out how to get two people in there, or a house that's structurally unsound to the point of being a tear down.

Armed with this foreknowledge, and having previously owned a home in California, I decided to sally forth to view a crop of flats located in the CBD (Central Business District).

Stops 1-3 were all located on Lygon Street in what was formerly student housing. Potential, thought I. Perhaps diamonds in the rough.

Having met a very amiable, yet instantly forgettable, Asian estate agent in the lobby of the building that stank of vinegar (I still don't know why), we entered its warren-like innards via a dank lift doubtless installed by the same company that was contracted by the Greater London Council to install all the lifts that stink of pee in council flats all over my former home town.

Up on levels 9, 7 and lucky number 8 (best for last I postulated) we were greeted by the mirthful sounds of females with a variety of Asian dialects. Ok, promising so far :-) However, all pretence of habitability faded when the assorted shabby doors opened and I saw something that could not have been bigger than 20 square metres in total that was supposed to house humans, not battery farm chickens or provide a place for intense home grown cultivation.

Picture a rectangular Lego block with two bedrooms, a shower stall/loo, and a hot plate on the left (passing for a kitchen I assume). Apparently three girls lived here, but where?

On my right I noticed a cupboard of a reasonable size for hanging two winter coats (possibly a scarf as well), and slightly further down a nook that might pass for spot to sit on a beanbag with a laptop, but in neither case would I call these spaces bedrooms. The question still begged, where did the humans go?

I asked one of the inhabitants who proudly pointed out her "bedroom", the aforementioned cupboard, whereupon I blinked and asked in Chinese "Gen duh ma?" ("really!!!!" - roughly translated), to which she nodded again looking rather pleased with herself. (The reason for this pride, I found out later, was because she alone slept there rather than sharing with anyone else).

Hurridly backing away before either the oxygen ran out or Claustrophobia kicked in,
I thanked them profusely and asked the estate agent what price this Lego-sized matchbox was going for, and was shocked to find the owners wanted $220,000 AUD!!!!!

Leaving feeling somehow dirty, I made my way over to the next spot which, once again, translated advertisement heaven in to reality hell for this time $260,000 AUD and upwards. As an interesting aside, it was quite telling listening to the hoards of Chinese giving these shitholes serious contemplation, which makes me wonder what the point of these people moving to Australia is, when all they seem to want to do is re-create the same shitty living conditions they came from. Anyway, I digress...

The cherry on this turd layer cake came with the final appointment of the day as I toured a converted multi-level hardware store on Bourke Street. My mind was running a million miles an hour because I had vivid memories of great lofts and industrial spaces from my time in NYC. Sadly it was not to be the case.

In an attempt to cash in on the stupidly high real estate prices in the CBD, the owners of the building had constructed an ant farm for humans choosing, seemingly at random, areas to cordon off with partitioning walls and calling these areas "flats". Granted, especially on my budget, the potential range of flats available is limited, but to ask $275,000 AUD for a single room with a loo seems a little greedy.

Needless to say my search continues...

Life redux

2009-08-08T05:36:00.000-07:00

Well, dear readers, it's that time of life again. You know, the one where you start to re-build, re-construct and re-edit the pieces of the past and massage them in to a vision of the future that seems both viable and attainable.

Since leaving Taiwan just over four months ago I've been stupidly busy, but in the moments between sales appointments and unpacking stuff that's arrived from my former island home, I've had, what alcoholics call, moments of clarity.

These momentary insights in to the frail condition that we, homo sapiens, call life have left me at times breathless, angry and puzzled, yet strangely they all seem to relate to having to begin again aged 42.

It has to be said I'm much luckier than many who never get the chance to re-do anything in their lives, and for that I'm really grateful to the good friends that have stood by me over the years. (You know who you are). That being said, there's a part of me that wants to be bitter. Double edged sword to be sure, but perhaps it's this duality that keeps driving me forward.

Thankfully, I find myself moving forward in a positive way with positive goals in the near term, and a happy vision of the longer term than I imagined possible whilst living in the 'wan.

All told, in the middle of my first Southern Hemisphere winter, quite a warm place to be, is it just global warming?

Partial updates

2009-07-25T04:01:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the long absence dear readers, but your humble narrator has been hard at work emigrating to Australia, starting work as an employee for the first time in many years, re-connecting with all things Western (like being paid overtime, sick and holiday pay), getting back in to shape by taking up surfing and skiing again, as well as starting the long search to purchase a house. Oh yes, and one more bit of stellar news, your humble narrator is now a single man "officially" for the first time since before most of you were born, that being 1992. Three cheers for me. Hip, hip.....

Crash, what's that sound. Oh dear, morning has broken.

2009-02-27T01:23:00.000-08:00

I awoke to the sound of birds merrily chirping, the sound of a gentle breeze rustling the spring growth outside my window, and the cries of gulls as they winged their way to greet the returning fishermen, laid heavy with a rich bounty from the sea.

Or,

I awoke to the sound of lorry gears grinding and the piped roar of motorbikes as they inched their way through the dense, rush-hour traffic heading in to London, the cry of a lone bird abruptly choked off as an ambulance, sirens howling, startled the winged bringer of morning song in to silence.

I'm going for the first one. What's your choice?

City v. Country

2009-02-27T00:41:00.000-08:00

As I continue my journey around the UK, with the latest stop being Chichester to visit old friends, I find the nature of being English changes dramatically once one leaves the city.

Two nights ago I had the pleasure of camping out to watch Liverpool v. Real Madrid in their efforts to secure a berth in the Champion's League at my friend’s local watering hole, and found the process to be rather surprising by comparison to London, both in terms of the financial impact of drinking locally, £4 a pint and the ambiance of the pub.

Within a few minutes of entering, I struck up a conversation with a local couple to my left and an avid Liverpool fan, or Real hater, on my right which, while football focused at the beginning, ended in an engaging conversation that lasted in to the wee hours. That sort of thing is typically not possible in London since it appears most people move in packs, and remain poe-faced and distant when contact is made in any context other than football.

Another remarkable difference was the quality of the pub grub, which although a vast improvement over my boyhood days in both the city and countryside, found this country local able to put out a magnificent steak and kidney pie, served piping hot, with locally sourced ingredients and a pastry top that couldn't have been any fresher. Furthermore, although London pubs generally offer a wider selection of ales, they lack the more intimate and inviting choices of locally brewed beers, ales and bitters, opting instead, for the most part, to serve mass-produced national brands.

From the huge, overstuffed sofas that littered the TV room, to the warmth of the locals, delicious food served in generous portions, and the merciful blast of central heating, I think it’s fair to say that Central London has a way to go before achieving what city folk used to scoff at.

City 0 - Countryside 1 (and it's worth more since it was away)

Why English food doesn't suck.

2009-02-21T00:28:00.000-08:00

Since the "pink foam pudding and custard" days of my youth, English food has undergone a remarkable transformation as I was happy to witness last night.

The trusty English chippie is probably better known than the royal family, and certainly more reliable than London Transport. A shining example of this is Olley's in Herne Hill which offers a broad selection of dishes that show what English chip shop food should be like.

From battered Mahi Mahi to steamed Hake, Coddies to Pickled Eggs, their menu has something for everyone, so if you find yourself in London, especially on a frosty evening in February, I highly recommend popping in, but get there early as seating is limited, and it's a popular place for all ages.

For more information hop over to their site at www.olleys.info

Bali..in the afterglow

2009-02-17T05:57:00.001-08:00

Well, dear readers, we're a few weeks on from my ocean frolicking, and I thought I'd revisit the blessed place mentally to add a little more information for anyone thinking about heading over to Indo for a holiday.

Think of the film, South Pacific, and what do you imagine? Warm ocean waters, passionate kisses on the beach, sea food and swimming in the buff? Well, ok maybe that's just me, but let's face it most people, if they know of the area, would probably paint a somewhat similar picture. The real trick is know where not to go, as much as knowing where to go, so let me offer a few tidbits of advice, for what they're worth.

If you love clean reefs and pristine waters, stay away from the cesspool of Kuta and Legian. I know I've said it before, but this is about as close to paradise as Las Vegas is to a healthy dinner menu with reasonable sized portions. Instead of choosing the offal and detritus, opt for somewhere off the beaten path like the Northwest coast, or funds permitting, jump on an eco-tour boat and head off-shore entirely to one of the many islands that dot the surrounding area.

Next on the list has to be the subject of food. Let's face it folks, you can buy Walker's crisps anywhere (pretty much) so why the hell would you want Western food on an Indonesian island? If your choice is a burger and a latte, go on holiday to Florida, or Disneyland, but if you fancy something that will leave your taste buds crying out for more, then go local. Granted, while this might require a tiny bit more effort, and the minimal risk of Bali Belly (Loperamide is your friend), the pay off is the education of your palate, and the warm, happy feeling of a stomach that knows it's being loved. Personal favourites have to include local catch almost anywhere, spicy shell fish with an Indonesia ceviche, all served with heapings of Bintang. Bon appetite!

Passion. Hang on tight ladies and gents, because it's going to be a bumpy ride and you're going to love it. As previously noted, Nusa Lembongan, courtesy of the Bali Hai II, has this one covered for days. Gay, straight, old, young, freshly minted, or jaded, I dare you to take a partner to one of the beach front huts and not have a magnificent romp of a time.

Well, that's it folks. From the deepest recesses of my heart, and uncharted bottom of my stomach, I'd have to say Bali has something for everyone, so get off your duff and get a flight there now!

The ghosts of the past...much wilder than the wind

2009-02-17T05:26:00.000-08:00

Greetings from what can only be described as a frosty U.K.

It's my first trip back here since 2004 and I'm pleased to say that much has changed in the environs surrounding SE23, but sadly little has changed within SE23 itself, and that goes for the subject line of this wintry entry.

Imagine, if you will, being able to return to a place you knew as a child and teen, only to find that many of the same problems that existed back in those dark, dreary days still wend their way through the corridors of today. How would you feel? How would you react, when so much of your adult life has been spent trying to overcome the horrors of that time. Would you feel progressively more uneasy, perhaps falling back in to some sort of half-remembered tension that left you constantly on the defence. Alas this is the case, and thus it's time, after a paltry four days, to pack the bags and move to sterile impersonality, yet emotionally safe, confines of paid lodging.

I must say that other than this more recent escalation, I had been enjoying my time here, whiling away the hours with friends from primary school and meeting old mates to recount the excesses of our youth, but what passes for harmless nostalgia between friends and classmates from the past, seems only to pick at the family scabs I believed were long since healed.

What was it about those times, as the baby boomers in the U.K. passed from exuberant hippies to family makers, that wore off, and left almost everyone I knew as a child the product of a broken home? My own guess is that as the high of the Summer of Love wore off, and the drudgery of the daily struggle to make ends meet grew more pressing, whatever chemical induced illusion had supported them at the beginning evaporated, leaving the skittish, jagged edges of a miserable low that we call the 70's.

At what point did one or 'toher wake to glance at the alien covered in booze induced sweat lying next to them, and think, "Who the hell is this person?" When did the supposed sanctity of marital vow turn in to the bitter litany of hate that's echoed through the last four decades, corrupting every ear it touched, and fuelling the disdain that cuts so sharp from that spurned tongue?

Sadly, I don't have the answers to these questions, but I did find the answer to my own demons many years ago in a very simple mantra. You can only control yourself.

For if you try to change or control other people, the net result is likely to leave you, the person introducing change, feeling dissatisfied and angry. Ultimately, we are all responsible for the choices we make as adults, but who foots the bill for those choices that SHOULD have been made to protect the children?

Nusa Lembongan

2009-02-01T18:42:00.000-08:00

After hacking away at the underbrush of the Taiwanese business world for the last three years, Bali might just have proved to be the inspiration for my new life off this little island. Azure seas, sun soaked shores, rice huts and frangipani, could this be the secret to eternal youth?

As the sun made its way over the horizon to caress the shores of Legian on my last day there, the early morning found your humble narrator anxious for something more "local" than the aforementioned herds of sun burnt tourists and their paid escorts. A 30 minute drive across town to the harbour, courtesy of my special friend, found us hopping about the Bali Hai II, and thence setting sail for Nusa Lembongan where, after an uneventful, hour long voyage, we arrived at the Bali Hai Resort.

While I'm not overly fond of package tours or resorts, the size of this place and its setting alone were enough to inspire confidence from the outset, primarily as the number of places to bed down for the night is limited to thirteen luxury huts constructed in the style of a traditional Balinese rice building, and the private beach front locale is off-limits to all but paying guests.

Since we arrived on the first morning boat our hut wasn't available right away, but the reception staff took care of storing our gear, and we made our way out to the skiff just in time to be whisked off up the coast for 45 minutes of crystal clear snorkelling in balmy, tropical waters.

Strangely enough, it was about 30 minutes in to free diving and generally acting like a playful otter, that I had a "moment of clarity". It dawned on me that perhaps one of the reasons so many native Balinese smile so much is because they have this wonderful combination of climate and unspoilt ocean to bask in, whereas, in stark contrast, Taiwanese seldom smile despite having a similar climate and being surrounded by ocean. I suspect the reason for this may be that most Taiwanese don't swim, and therefore never get to experience the majesty of the seas, and it may have something to do with the fact they also live in the second most densely populated country in the world, ranking right behind Bangladesh! Also proof, I suspect, that the Taiwanese penchant for the acquisition of money, rather than the enjoyment of life, is entirely misplaced.

After my otter-like snokelling experience, it was time to head back to the main resort area for check-in and lunch, both of which were accomplished with a minimum of fuss, and then we returned to the skiff for another journey out to the snorkelling area. Do you get the idea that I LOVE the ocean?? I do too, but I'd forgotten how much until I got back in to the sea that afternoon.

Hasty re-applications of waterproof SPF 48+, one more trip back in to the main resort and another skiff ride back, saw your humble, salty narrator lost in the warmth that can only be found in the tropics, which induces retrospection, and during this moment I realised I would be quite content to spend the rest of my days engaged in these pursuits.

As the afternoon waned and drew towards the sun's final curtain, it was with a good deal of reluctance that I faced the prospect of being land locked over night, for as any travelling Brit can attest, the winged vapires of the evening do seem to relish the taste of white meat. As luck would have it though, dining al fresco proved to be something of a delight for the food was sumptuous and was served to the sound of waves teasing the sand, yet nowhere were those pesky parasites to be found.

After a quick mid-meal stroll I discovered a table just adjacent to my own, populated with heavy-set Russians who had apparently cornered the market on the "sweet meat" department, much to the delight of myself and the no-see-ums, who had settled in for their own open air dining experience. Who said Russian tourists are annoying? Oh wait, that was me earlier. Duly retracted and all is forgiven!

Blissfully intoxicated from the warm sea breezes that had been wafting over me all evening, the excellent seafood from dinner and the smooth, buttery Australian Chardonnay, the wee hours found me overcome with the heady scent of Frangipani luring me to bed, and after taking care of the pre-bed essentials, I finally drew the day's events to a close by scaling the ladder in to my hut, and drifting off to a careless slumber, the like of which I haven't experienced in many years.

It was, perhaps, during this somnolence I finally found the peace that can only come when all the body's faculties have been adequately exercised; where mind, emotion and muscle come together in a perfect melange, and permit complete escape.

I awoke as the faint glimmer of the sun's first rays made their way over the horizon and warmed the tropical blackness of the hut, comforted by my serenity and wishing for nothing more than a perpetual repeat of the day just past.

If you think paradise doesn't exist, I suggest you follow in my footsteps and find out for yourself.

http://www.balihaicruises.com/html/index.php?id=4

Lo, and behold

2009-01-23T08:05:00.000-08:00

What triggers that childhood memory that lay once forgotten in the distant recesses of your not-so-youthful brain? Perhaps the smell of cotton candy at the state fair, for the Americans reading this, and how about the smell of sweet popcorn at the Odeon for those hailing from the UK in the late 70's/early 80s? For me it has to be musical, rather than a particular smell, and so it is with Bali far off the beaten path.

Lo and behold, the myth of Bali can be summed up is two short sentences, main street, and everywhere else.

As previously noted, Legian Street, Bali, is a soulless corridor lined with all that tacky tourist crap that one expects from a third world country, but what truly surprises is the dynamic change that occurs a few KM from the main artery.

If your idea of a holiday is shopping for name brands, at over inflated prices, and haggling for a "discount", then by all means stick to the well travelled, hawker lined, congested corridors that represent "main stream" Bali. However, if you can spare the prostitutional cry of the vendors for a few minutes, turn off the beaten path and spare a thought for the combo couples (Western and Balinese) who line the side streets offering a truly unique insight in to Bali, local style.

What's the difference, you might ask yourself, for surely the big corporations have a handle on all that's best to offer on these semi-democratic islands. Yet, my resounding reply would have to be "NO".

Take a chance, step off the soiled trail of the masses, experience the island of the locals, and stop feeding those annoying buggers who pester everyone, endlessly, with cries of "Massag-ee", "Transport Boss", and "Sexy Message".

Bali-hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

2009-01-22T01:54:00.000-08:00

So here I am in Kuta, Bali, but much to much surprise I'm sitting in an internet cafe half way down Legian Street wondering why this place looks and sounds like Tijuana.

From the raucous cacophony of scooters and taxis honking every few seconds, to the constant barrage of "Massag-ee sir", "Transport boss", "Sunglass, cheap", and tacky techno booming from countless surf shops, intermingled with the pressing humidity and overwhelming exhaust fumes, the climate is anything but relaxing.

However, despite the somewhat sleazy reality of sunburnt, shirtless, heavily tattooed Russians and Aussies with beer guts, parading up and down looking for that sexy massage, my walk yesterday revealed the other side of the island away from the "Bull-ee" life that permeates so much of everything that happens here.

Heading North out of Kuta, and around the bay past the rows of expensive hotels that litter the beach front, there lies a serene, pristine section of beach that offers a glimpse of what Bali should and could be.

Set back slightly from the sand, and dotted amongst the beach brush, this area sports a number of tasty seafood restaurants that offer delicious dining along the waterline, where the only sounds that intrude are the hushed tones of happy couples and families combined with the hypnotic sway of the tide caressing the shoreline.

Arriving early enough, tables are plentiful, and offer a fantastic opportunity to watch the majestic descent of the sun over the ocean, while enjoying a frosty Bintang, or perhaps the soothing flavour of fresh coconut milk, delivered inside its original container.

As dusk turns to dark, a small strolling band of musicians plies their wares which range from a nicely re-worked version of Hotel California to local Balinese music, and the smell of smoked seafood rises from the grill, tempting one to indulge to the point of excess.

After your appetite has been sated, a leisurely stroll along the shore heading northwards offers many chances to see small crabs burrowing under the sand for the night, and for the more adventurous, perhaps a quick dip in the balmy waters. (Just remember to wait an hour after eating, like your Mum told you!)

Ultimately, Bali, like many other tropical destinations, suffers from far too much commercialism in far too many places, but if you're willing to head off the beaten path and hunt beyond the tacky souvenir maps, you might just be as pleasantly surprised as I was.

You know you're Taiwanese when...

2009-01-10T09:56:00.000-08:00

1. You look like you are 18 regardless of your age.
2. You like to eat chicken feet.
3. You suck on fish heads and fish fins.
4. You have a Chinese knick-knack hanging on your rear view mirror.
5. You sing Karaoke.
6. Your house is covered with tile.
7. Your kitchen is covered by a sticky film of grease.
8. Your stove is covered with aluminium foil.
9. You leave the plastic covers on your remote control.
10.You've never kissed your mum or dad.
11.You've never hugged your mum or dad.
12.Your unassisted vision is worse than 20/500.
13.You wear contacts, to avoid wearing your "coke bottle glasses".
14.You've worn glasses since you were in primary school.
15.Your hair sticks up when you wake up.
16.You'll haggle over something that is not negotiable.
17.You love to use coupons.
18.You drive around looking for the cheapest petrol.
19.You drive around for hours looking for the best parking space.
20.You take showers at night.
21.You avoid the non-free snacks in hotel rooms.
22.You don't mind squeezing 20 people into one motel room.
23.Most girls have more body hair than you, if you are male.
24.You tap the table when someone pours tea for you.
25.You say "Aiya!" and "Wah!" frequently.
26.You don't want to wear your seatbelt because it is uncomfortable.
27.You love Las Vegas, slot machines, and blackjack.
28.You un-wrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can reuse the paper.
29.You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off.
30.You have a vinyl table cloth on your kitchen table.
31.You spit bones and other food scraps on the table. (That's why you need the vinyl tablecloth).
32.You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time.
33.You use the dishwasher as a dish rack.
34.You have never used your dishwasher.
35.You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times.
36.You eat all meals in the kitchen.
37.You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers.
38.You have a piano in your living room
39.You pick your teeth at the dinner table (but you cover your mouth).
40. You twirl your pen around your fingers.
41.You hate to waste food.
42.You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing.
43.You don't own any real Tupperware - only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.
44.You also use the jam jars as drinking glasses.
45.You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel.
46.You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes). These snacks are always dried and include dried plums, mango, ginger, and squid.
47.You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.
48.Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself.
49.The dash board of your Honda is covered by hundreds of small toys.
50.You don't use measuring cups.
51.You beat eggs with chopsticks.
52.You have a teacup with a cover on it.
53.You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling directory enquiries costs money.
54.You only make long distance calls after 11pm.
55.If you are male, you clap at something funny and if you are female, you giggle whilst placing a hand over your mouth.
56.You like Chinese films in their original un-dubbed versions.
57.You love Chinese Martial Arts films.
58.You've learnt some form of martial arts.
59.Shaolin actually mean something to you.
60.You like congee with thousand year old eggs.
61.You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached.
62.You never call your parents just to say hi.
63.If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
64.When you're sick, your parents tell you not to eat fried foods or baked goods due to "yeet hay".
65.You know what yeet hay is.
66.You e-mail your friends at work, even though you're only 10 feet apart.
67.You use a face cloth.
68.You starve yourself before going to all you can eat places.
69.You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewellery or electronics.
70.You save your old Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again.
71.You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.
72.Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin.
73.You know what moon cakes are.
74.When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has moved out.
75.Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles.
76.You play a musical instrument.
77.Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.
78.You've eaten a red bean popsicle.
79.You bring oranges (or other produce) with you as a gift when you visit people's homes.
80.You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
81.You majored in something practical like engineering, medicine or law.
82.You live with your parents and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way), or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in the apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighbourhood.
83.You don't tip more than 0% at a restaurant, and if you do, you tip Chinese delivery guys/waiters more.
84.You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.
85.You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.
86.You are a 30 year old married man who raises a family while still living with his parents.
87.Total strangers call you "maymay"/ "jeje" /"dede"/ or "guhguh" and you respond.
88.You know why there are 88 items on this list.

Better living through chemistry!

2009-01-07T05:15:00.000-08:00

As the 14th of December, 2008 swept past and I hit a soon-to-be-over-the-hill 42, a little something clicked and made me reflect on the meaning of it all.

Is the idea that I'm finite and wherever the finishing line is I'm that much closer than I was ten years ago? Could it be the futility of the daily grind? Or perhaps having to start over (again) after spending two decades building a life in the States, and three years struggling to eke out a living here in Taiwan? (Yes, I'm somewhat bitter about those last two)

Food for thought, all, but I suspect the answer might be simpler than any of these things. For me, it's choice.

For those of us who grew up in the U.K., or Great Britain as Thatcher's government rather optimistically called it, there came a moment in the secondary school cycle, at about 11-12 years old, where a teacher sat us all down and tried find out what we wanted to be when we "grew up". Evidently the process of determining our future paths must have gone something like this:

Option One:
1) Is the student good at any subject?
2) What is the student's best grade in a subject?
3) Recommend that course of study as a career

Option Two:
1) Is the student good at a sport?
2) Which sport?
3) Recommend that sport as a career

Option Three:
1) Manual Labour

These rather crass choices tended to lump those with neither an academic leaning, nor the ability to deftly dribble a ball, in to a career behind the counter at Sainsbury's, or some other form of less-than-rewarding employment. However, as modern research has proven, test taking and physical prowess are only two ways to measure ability, from a diverse spectrum that includes the uber-geek skills of people like Woz and Bill Gates, to the ability to sell anyone anything using creative communication skills, technically known as the bull-shit factor.

As in all aspects of nature, different members of the same genetic family inherit different traits from their parents, so why should it be that education favours a two-sizes fits all approach to the classroom?

In my own experience as a student in the U.K. and with my son in the Saddleback Unified School District of Orange County, there is a clear bias to make pupils fit a certain mold, their definition of "normal", and if the child doesn't fit he or she is shoved the back of the room and heartily ignored or punished for being "different". So why is it that these these out-dated stereotypes and labels continue to haunt me as an adult?

"Better living through Chemistry", a mate of mine once said, and although he turned out to be a complete slacker, his motto turned out to be the panacea for my condition. As it turns out, modern medical science holds the answer to my questions. Something the Chinese speakers call Gwor Dong Err, and the rest of us call Attention Deficit (Hyperactive) Disorder, or ADHD. Of course, don't tell that to my Mum, who doesn't believe ADHD exists, instead choosing to believe that I'm just a lazy, under-achieving, sod.

Personally, Ritalin has proven the bolster to my defences, and I only wish it had been around when I was a nipper, yet the perception my Mum voices is a far too commonly held belief which persists to this day, despite concrete evidence to the contrary. So the next time you meet someone who's too chatty, or looses the plot half way through a conversation, don't write them off as loosers, as you might just be surprised. Those who take a moment to really get to know people with ADHD are often struck by their intelligence, compassion, warth and vitality, just as in the case of your humble narrator.

If you'd like to find out more about childhood and adult ADHD, take a look here http://add.about.com/od/adhdthebasics/a/ADHDbasics.htm or head over to this incredibly informative site: http://add.org/

Thanks for paying attention this long!

2008, time to implode.

2008-12-30T22:27:00.000-08:00

As I turn the final page on my 2008 calendar, I'd like to extend my wishes for the new year in the hope that someone might read them and help make them come true.

1) China (that's the mainland, not the Republic of China, Taiwan) will implode. I sincerely hope their economy will collapse and the pseudo-communist leaders will be lined up against the wall and dispatched, to be replaced by an educated, freedom-loving democratic leadership.

2) The KMT will implode. Consumed by their own greed and overwhelmed by the shame of having sold this island off to the Chinese, Ma Ing Jeou will take his own life, followed quickly by Scumbag Lien, Mr. Hairpiece and the other snivelling warthogs that run the KMT.

3) George Bush, Dick Chaney, Cunti Rice and Donald Rumsfeld will implode. Collectively realising their culpability for infliciting war on two regions that were relatively stable beforehand, and having orchestrated mass slaughter, presided over the largest U.S. budget short-coming ever, as well as conducted illegal torture, condoned bribery, and reduced the U.S. economy to a staggering slag heap, the aforementioned book airtime on all major networks so they can commit suicide in public.

4) Tony Blair implodes. What happened Tony. Damn man, things looked and sounded good when you started but then you turned in to a simpering, born-again, neo-con. Your punishment for being so stupid is to top yourself at the first opportunity.

5) Mugabe implodes. You're just another useless dictatorial fop in yet another Africian banana republic, so do us all a favour and pop your clogs.

Best wishes for a very happy 2009!

Democracy, Taiwan style

2008-12-30T00:24:00.000-08:00

http://www.yushantv.blogspot.com/

For those of you who missed an English-language version of the recent Chinese envoy's visit to Taiwan, this link shows what Ma's government considers appropriate behaviour for the national police force to engage in.

It honestly made me weep.

If you'd like to know more about Taiwan, check out this link: http://keeptaiwanfree.org/today/2008/09/25/some-facts-about-taiwan/

An attache by any other name.

2008-12-15T19:55:00.000-08:00

The on-going unwinding of civil liberties that's taking place in Taiwan staggers the mind, but the latest act of stupidity has made quite obvious what many of us that inhabit this little island have feared since Ma Ing-Joke and puppets took over in May. The Chinks are coming!

As reported recently in the Taipei Times here: http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/front/archives/2008/12/08/2003430573 the Taiwanese Ministry of Defence has re-named the military representatives to the U.S., downgrading them from attache to secretary.

So what's in a name, you might be asking yourself? The real problem here lies with Taiwan's tenuous position in East Asia, as America is the only nation that has pledged military support in light of a Chinese invasion. By removing the title attache from these posts, the KMT have stripped the Taiwanese military of any official recognition by the U.S., and sullied the already muddy waters of international communication. Which means that should the PRC make a move, and I suspect they will once the lunar new year passes, U.S. support won't be forthcoming and Taiwan will disappear in to the "collective" faster than you can say Borg.

Why it sucks to be a Taiwanese driver, or a foreigner that has to share the roads with them.

2008-12-01T07:15:00.000-08:00

From the overwhelming array of smells, or surreal number of people, for someone that's never been to Taiwan all things Asian can seem exotic and enchanting. However, for those of us who've survived alternating seasons of dripping humidity and batterings by various typhoons, as well as being run over by blue vans and taxis, the reality of living here is a little different.

The Taiwanese have a saying that goes something like this, "If you can drive in Taiwan, you can drive anywhere". However, as anyone who's visited here even briefly knows, the Taiwanese can't drive! I suspect the reason behind this national shortcoming has its roots in a variety of areas which I'll attempt to address:

1) Education. The biggest problem is a lack of it. All the things Brits are taught, in what must be the most gruelling written and road test worldwide, are absent here. The written test is laughably easy, since everyone takes driving training in driving schools that have exact copies of all the questions that are going to be asked. The driving tests, for both car and scooter, encompass crawling around a closed-course track that has about as much relation to the real world as playing with Scalextric cars. Student drivers do not have to use local streets, much less actually negotiate the freeway system, which means when they pass their test and enter the over crowded streets that clog the cities, they are woefully unprepared for reality.

2) Vision. Since the Taiwanese have the highest rate of corrected vision in the world, looking ahead and anticipation are things lacking from the island psyche which means the locals have adopted an ostrich style of driving, namely, if I drive with my head down so I can't see anything else, nothing else can see me, and therefore I won't get in to an accident.

3) Thought process. The Taiwanese mentality is, by in large, is a product of mainland China, via the heavy handed KMT "educational" textbooks dolled out in primary and secondary schools, with some American influences, thanks to the U.S. military that were stationed here post-WWII as part of the anti-Communist efforts. Unfortunately, neither set of influences encourages independent thought, but rather stresses the need to conform to the norms of society as it was envisioned in the 1950's. Monkey see-monkey d0, if you will.

4) Which brings me to group think. What is it about the Taiwanese mentality that allows people to do things without thinking simply because someone else does the same thing? Need a good laugh, try this the next time you stop at a red light. Once you pull up, turn your scooter engine off, then wait until the light in the other direction starts turning orange. Quickly start your scooter, rev the engine, then sit back and watch the ensuing chaos, as people start driving through on-coming traffic against the red light. As near as I can fathom, the overwhelming urge to conform forces Taiwanese to listen to the sound of a revving engine and assume it's time to go, rather than looking at the traffic light and seeing it's still red.

5) I honk therefore I am. A certain segment of the population, namely lorry, taxi and blue van drivers, believe that, in addition to the ostrich syndrome mentioned above, their chosen profession allows them the divine right to ignore any form of traffic direction. Seeing and hearing one of these beasts hurtling through a left or right hand turn, when the light has been red for several seconds, all the while honking like crazy, literally stuns even the most jaded foreigner. Their recklessness is so blatant it should demand a consistently high place in the Darwin Awards, simply for its idiocy.

Think I'm making it all up? Tube this, and judge for yourself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCxJMHdQgl4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUJF0omwviQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJyDDeLTBw4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QanJxUgQ2H8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkQ8-_D2vKg&NR=1

Better living through chemistry.

2008-11-24T21:32:00.000-08:00

Freedom House Calls for Inquiry into Taiwan Clashes

2008-11-24T19:53:00.000-08:00

Press Release
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: Laura Ingalls

Freedom House Calls for Inquiry into Taiwan Clashes

Washington

November 20, 2008

Freedom House urges Taiwan's government to create an independent commission to thoroughly investigate clashes between police and activists protesting Chinese envoy Chen Yunlin's historic visit and recommend needed reforms."

A public investigation of the violence—which involved both sides—will send a critical message that the new government of President Ma Ying-jeou is interested in upholding the democratic values of transparency and accountability," said Jennifer Windsor, Freedom House executive director. "The inquiry should examine evidence on both sides and recommend any needed reforms to police practices and the legal framework governing demonstrations."

Hundreds of university students are currently staging a sit-in in Taipei's Freedom Square and several other cities to protest the government's handling of the incident. During Chen’s visit, police reportedly used heavy-handed tactics—including physical assault, arbitrary detention and destruction of property—to prevent Chen from seeing symbols of Taiwanese or Tibetan independence, as well as broader demonstrations against the Chinese regime. Demonstrators also employed violence against police, throwing rocks and petrol bombs outside Chen's hotel on November 6.

The clashes reveal a need for police to undergo crowd control training that adheres to the standards used in other democracies. Likewise, demonstrators and political advocacy groups must recommit themselves to orderly protests that avoid violence under any circumstances.

The inquiry commission should examine controversial passages in Taiwan's Assembly and Parade Law, such as restrictions on where people are allowed to demonstrate, and determine whether they need to be liberalized to protect citizens' rights to freedom of expression and assembly. The commission should also investigate claims that police are selectively enforcing the law.

The visit by Chen, the most senior Chinese official to visit Taiwan since it split from China in 1949, and the recent arrests of several opposition party figures are raising concerns that that President Ma and his Kuomintang Party may rollback democratic freedoms."

The government must renew its commitment to tolerating robust freedom of assembly and peaceful protest, no matter what the cause," said Windsor.

Taiwan is ranked Free in the 2008 edition of Freedom in the World, Freedom House's survey of political rights and civil liberties, and in the 2008 version of Freedom of the Press.

http://www.freedomhouse.org/template.cfm?page=70&release=725

Can I have some too?

2008-11-18T22:48:00.000-08:00

Living in what might be described as the information hinterland of Asia, Western news is often difficult to come by in Taiwan. That notwithstanding, I stumbled across a blurb on CNN relating to the financial bail out package (700 billion USD), which mentioned the CEOs of America's automotive industry were up on Capitol Hill asking for a 25 billion USD bail-out for their own sorry industry.

The substance behind their request went something like:

CEOs: We'd like some money, actually a lot of money.
Senators: Why?
CEOs: Well, since the financial industry was bailed out using tax payer money even though it was hopelessly mis-managed by crooks who lined their own pockets rather than representing the best interests of their clients, we'd like the same deal.
Senators: Why?
CEOs: Just like the financial industry, if U.S. auto making goes bankrupt, it will hurt the domestic economy through job loss and the decline of an American manufacturing tradition.
Senators: Why? No one buys American cars anyway.
CEOs: *thinking* Oh shit, they've seen through our ploy.
Uncomfortable silence
News clip ends.

American automotive design and manufacturing has not been of any importance since the late 1970's, and has, in fact, been totally eclipsed by product from Asia and Europe for decades.

As anyone who has ever driven an American car knows, they are dross. So after years of dreadful product design, huge engines that have no regard for fuel efficiency, buy now-pay never promotions at the dealer level, the industry is teetering on the verge of collapse. Good, let them fold. Perhaps this will give people a sharp reminder what oversight, response to market demand, and value for money are supposed to represent.

I respectfully suggest to the general public and members of Congress, not one penny! No tax pay money. No government bail-out. No helping hands. For if a financial aid package is approved then who's next? Me?

Canadian Human Rights Association Puts Ma Ying-jeou's Government on Watch List

2008-11-18T22:32:00.000-08:00

Thursday November 13, by Jerome F. Keating Ph.D.

Statement by Taiwanese Human Rights Association of Canada, November 13, 2008 Condemns Ongoing Political Prosecutions in Taiwan Calls on Human Rights groups to put the "Republic of China" on watch list

The Taiwanese Human Rights Association of Canada has watched with increasing concern over the past few months as the Chinese Nationalist Party (KMT) government on Taiwan has carried out a series of arrests, detentions without charge, impeachments, and "evidence gathering" raids against officials of the previous DPP administration, legislators, local government officials and diplomats. These are ostensibly all part of an anti-corruption campaign to uncover evidence for prosecution of President Chen Shui-bian and his family for financial misdeeds. But they have been accompanied, perhaps driven, by a vicious hate campaign against "the monster Chen Shui-bian" (United Daily News October 30) in the KMT media, and frequent "revelations" of confidential prosecutorial information by KMT legislators.

Looking at this complex series of events, we are led to conclude that the KMT is abusing the justice system, Control Yuan, and media in Taiwan, using them as tools of character assassination and a political settling of accounts with the opposition.

Almost 30 years ago, in 1980, the KMT carried out a similar campaign to decapitate the opposition after the December 10, 1979 Kaohsiung Incident. Then it was under the excuse of opposing violence and suppressing rebellion. A campaign of vilification and dehumanization of the accused was followed by a series of show trials. How ironic that Chen Shui-bian was a defense lawyer for some of those charged. Today this kind of political play is being re-enacted, under the banner of opposing corruption.

THRAC calls on the KMT to cease these political prosecutions, free those who have been detained without charge, and respect the independence of the justice system. In a democracy change of parties in power is normal, as is holding officials responsible for their deeds. But majority governments must respect the opinions and rights of minorities on controversial issues. Political settling of accounts is the death knell of democracy.

We call on all organizations and individuals who have supported Taiwan's struggle for democracy and human rights these past 30 years, to once again put Taiwan on their watch list. We urge them to express their concern over these disturbing developments.

We commit ourselves to renewed vigilance of human rights in Taiwan in the current poisoned political situation there.

For inquiries: Rev. Michael Stainton, President, THRAC michaels@yorku.ca or 416-224-1870

http://zen.sandiego.edu:8080/Jerome/1226648207/index_html

The best ad from the U.S. election

2008-11-15T20:24:00.000-08:00

Remember the classic WAZZZZZZZZZUP ad from 2000? It's been updated:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndzWVnD7-vQ

Enjoy!

The return of martial law...

2008-11-13T07:14:00.000-08:00

I recently ran across this posting on Facebook and felt it was well worth re-posting in my blog. http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?topic=6059&post=34540&uid=2204497989#post34540
If you feel, as I and many others do, that democracy is worth protecting at all costs, please forward links to my blog or the original article, and try to spread the word to as many of your politically aware friends as possible.

Alex.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Political arrests and detentions in Taiwan

Present and former DPP officials arrested

07 November 2008

Over the past few weeks, the Kuomintang authorities in Taiwan have arrested and detained a number of present and former DPP officials (see list below). The one-sidedness of the arrests -- only DPP members were detained -- and the incommunicado incarceration have led many observers to fear an erosion of justice and a return to the dark days of the KMT's martial law (1947-1987).The arrests prompted the following expression of concern from a group of scholars and writers in the US, Canada, Europe and Australia. The joint statement received the following coverage in the media: Taipei Times, November 5th 2008: Experts on Taiwan slam recent detentions

The swiftly deteriorating human rights situation was also highlighted in the following articles:Taiwan News, November 5th 2008: DPP opposition: Taiwan's democracy, freedom of speech in danger

Taiwan News, November 5th 2008: Lawyers slam Ma for wrecking Taiwan human rights

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scholars and writers express concern about prosecutions in Taiwan

Washington DC. The undersigned, scholars and writers from the US, Canada, Europe and Australia wish to express their deep concern about the recent series of detentions in Taiwan of present and former DPP government officials. To date there have been at least seven such cases.

It is obvious that there have been cases of corruption in Taiwan, but these have occurred in both political camps. The political neutrality of the judicial system is an essential element in a democracy. It is also essential that any accused are considered innocent until proven guilty in the court of law.

We also believe that the procedures followed by the prosecutor's offices are severely flawed: while one or two of the accused have been formally charged, the majority is being held incommunicado without being charged. This is a severe contravention of the writ of habeas corpus and a basic violation of due process, justice and the rule of law.

In the meantime, the prosecutor's offices evidently leak detrimental information to the press. This kind of "trial by press" is a violation of the basic standards of judicial procedures. It also gives the distinct impression that the Kuomintang authorities are using the judicial system to get even with members of the former DPP government. In addition, the people who are being held incommunicado are of course unable to defend themselves against the misreporting and the leaks in the news media.

We do firmly believe that any alleged wrongdoings must be dealt with in a fair and open manner in an impartial court. Justice through the rule of law is essential to Taiwan's efforts to consolidate democracy and protect fundamental human rights.

We do not want to see Taiwan's hard-earned democracy jeopardized in this manner. Taiwan can justifiably be proud of its transition to democracy in the late 1980s and early 1990s. It would be sad for Taiwan and detrimental to its international image if the progress which was made during the past 20 years would be erased. Taiwan needs to move forward, not backwards to the unfair and unjust procedures as practiced during the dark days of Martial Law (1947-87).

Signatories:Names of those who joined later are marked with a *
Nat Bellocchi, former Chairman of the American Institute in Taiwan
Julian Baum, former Taiwan Bureau Chief, Far Eastern Economic Review
Coen Blaauw, Formosan Association for Public Affairs, Washington DC
David Prager Branner, Director at Large (East Asia), American Oriental Society
Stéphane Corcuff, Associate Professor of Political Science, China and Taiwan Studies, University of Lyon, France *
Gordon G. Chang, author, "The Coming Collapse of China."
David Curtis Wright, Associate Professor of History, University of Calgary *
June Teufel Dreyer, Professor of Political Science, University of Miami, Florida
Edward Friedman, Professor of Political Science and East Asian Studies, University of Wisconsin, Madison
Mark Harrison, Senior Lecturer, Head of of Chinese School of Asian Languages and Studies, University of Tasmania, Australia
* Bruce Jacobs, Professor of Asian Languages and Studies, Monash University, Melbourne, Australia
Richard C. Kagan, Professor Emeritus of History, Hamline University, St. Paul Minnesota Jerome F. Keating, Associate Professor, National Taipei University (Ret.). Author, "Island in the Stream, a quick case study of Taiwan's complex history" and other works on Taiwan
Daniel Lynch, Associate Professor, School of International Relations, University of Southern California
Victor H. Mair, Professor of Chinese Language and Literature, University of Pennsylvania Donald Rodgers, Associate Professor of Political Science, Austin College, Texas
Terence Russell, Professor of Chinese Language and Literature, University of Manitoba
Scott Simon, Professor of Sociology and Anthropology, University of Ottawa
Peter Tague, Professor of Law, Georgetown University
* John J. Tkacik Jr., Senior Research Fellow, The Heritage Foundation, Washington DC
Vincent Wei-cheng Wang, Professor of Political Science, University of Richmond, Virginia
Arthur Waldron, Lauder Professor of International Relations, University of Pennsylvania
Gerrit van der Wees, Editor Taiwan Communiqué, Washington DC
Stephen Yates, President of DC Asia Advisory and former Deputy Assistant to the Vice President for National Security Affairs

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Specific cases of concern

The arrest and detention on October 15th of former Interior minister Yu Cheng-hsien; The arrest and detention on October 27th of former Hsinchu Science Park Director and Deputy Minister of Environmental Protection Dr. James Lee; The arrest and detention on October 29th of DPP Chiayi County Commissioner Chen Ming-wen; The indictment on October 30th of DPP Tainan City Councilor Wang Ting-yu; The arrest and detention on October 31st of former National Security Council (NSC) secretary-general and Deputy Prime Minister Chiou I-jen; The questioning of former Foreign Minister Dr. Mark Chen on November 3rd and insinuations in the press that he might be charged and arrested; The arrest and detention on November 4th of DPP Yunlin County Magistrate Ms. Su Chih-fen. http://www.taiwandc.org/Statement%20arrests%20Nov%202008.htm

Why China sucks updated

2008-11-05T23:55:00.000-08:00

Googling "Why China Sucks", brought me to the following page:
http://liaoyusheng.com/archives/travel/20041105_ten_reasons_why_china_sucks.php

After reading the posting it seems that what was true in 2004, is even truer now, however, as the author noted, his list didn't include anything political.

I've decided to expand the original list to include a few missing items.

1) The Cultural Revolution. "Welcome to the dark ages, my name is Mao Tse Dong, and I'll be executing or re-educating you today!" The Cultural Revolution was responsible for destroying the legacy of Chinese culture including countless books, traditional writings, and historically significant sites, in addition to exterminating anyone with an education, which is clearly why the mainland Chinese are so ignorant today. Think, the Chinese Taliban!

2) Commu-capitalism. If Mao Tse Dong were alive today, he'd have the entire PRC ruling class executed, which wouldn't be a bad thing, as far as I'm concerned.

Communism and Marxism developed in response to systems of governance that benefited the few while exploiting the masses, at a time when such practices were commonplace in countries like England, Russia and France at the turn of the last century. However, taking a look at modern China, it's obvious the PRC leadership have forgotten their roots and instead chosen to follow the same path as the Regan, Bush and Shrub administrations, namely world domination through financial and military expansion.

If the PRC leadership were smart, and obviously they're not, they would review their history and note that communism now exists only in the PRC, Cuba, North Korea, Laos, and Vietnam, and in a smattering of elected governments in places like Cyprus, Moldova, and Nepal. Hardly a who's who of notable nations.

Clearly, totalitarianism doesn't work, and the PRC appears to be transitioning to a market economy. However, it's not possible to embrace a free-market system without allowing political and social reform, so which is it fellas, Communism or Capitalism?

2) Human rights. The Chinese people rise up and scream blue bloody murder at the Japanese for being unrepentant about the horrendous abuses perpetrated by the Japanese military during WWII, but where are the same people screaming at their own government for doing the same to Chinese people now?

3) Pollution. China is one filthy country, but rather than try to dredge up something new I'll let the folks at the Christian Science Monitor say it for me: http://www.csmonitor.com/2008/0319/p09s01-coop.html

That's it for now, but undoubtedly, as I run across more information, I'll be updating this list.

Bye, bye Bush, and remember to take the rubbish out when you leave.

2008-11-04T21:51:00.000-08:00

Sometime around 0400 here in Taiwan, I woke from a deep sleep feeling suddenly light-headed. House on fire? Mosquitoes? PRC invading? Nope, none of those, thankfully. After firing up the trusty laptop, I found the source of my relief, Obama won.

With victory now secured, I'd like to think Obama and the Democrats, would put their majority in both houses to good use, perhaps starting by rolling back the Patriot Act, yet I suspect things might not work out quite as many democrats are hoping.

For starters, there's the dire financial situation the U.S. finds itself in now. The Republican's solution has been to print lots more money and throw it at the problem, however, as anyone with half a working cerebral cortex knows, printing 700 billion bits of paper is ostensibly worthless, since the paper itself has no value, and there is no actual product to support the value of the currency.

Here's a wild idea, instead of printing more bits of paper, how about giving American businesses incentives to hire and produce within the country, rather than pissing away American jobs overseas. Done correctly, this would have the added benefit of gutting the Chinese economy, thereby removing one of the biggest gross polluters on the planet, and ensuring the PRC's military expenditures get cut. Assuming this happened, it would almost certainly ensure peace in Asia since China would have to use what little current account revenue it had to support its enormous population, and would therefore be without the necessary budget to threaten democracies like Taiwan.

Next up, how does Obama plan to counter the evangelical movement and exorcise religion from government, thereby swinging American back in the direction the Founding Fathers intended, with a clear division between church and state. I suspect the hard-line thumpers are so ingrained in U.S. politics as to be almost invisible, which means this problem is going to be very hard to solve without resorting to a witch hunt. Then again, after watching Jesus Camp, perhaps it's the right time to stoke the pyres with evangelical fodder.

Which leads me to consumption. America, with a population of just over 300 million, consumes 25% of the world's energy resources, while representing just 4.54% of the total global headcount. Something is drastically wrong with these figures, for if sustainability and environmental stewardship are priorities, and let's hope the incoming administration thinks they are, then how does this imbalanced equation change?

Clearly, a paradigm shift needs to take place in America, and the shift needs to move education to the forefront as a priority rather than the military. This problem can be best illustrated by looking at U.S. budget expenditures for 2007, which totalled $2.7 trillion. From this obscene amount of money, the military received $663.8 billion (5.53%), which neither include the war in Iraq or nor the war in Afghanistan, and excludes the Global War on Terrorism, as compared to education which received a paltry $89.9 billion (0.75%). What would happen if these numbers were reversed?

If people did recall the events of the past, they might look back a few years and realise what's happening now comes as a direct result of Regan's foreign policy, that clearly prioritised the expansion of U.S. business at any cost, and fiscal irresponsibility that gave us the likes of Dennis Kozlowski, a real-life Gordon Gekko. However, as Gore Vidal so prophetically stated, the acronym U.S.A seems to stand for the "United States of Amnesia", so I feel it's unlikely any such recollection will take place. Yet, should such a soul-searching take place let's hope that this new administration has enough clout to knock the christian fundamentalists, evangelicals and good old boys out of office permanently, and restore America's standing on the world stage through carefully considered domestic and foreign policy, rather than trying to bully the planet in to submission.

Ma Ing Joke. Too bad no one's laughing.

2008-11-04T05:18:00.001-08:00

Taiwan appears headed into the depths of civil unrest, but strangely its leader is missing.

Is it just me, or does Ma Ing Joke seem to have the same knack for disappearing in times of strife as say, George Bush or Kim Jong Il?

With Taiwanese news outlets, both left and right, filled to the brim with video of citizenry continuing their protests against Chun Yu-Lin's visit, and the heavy-handedness of the police when confronting these gatherings, where is the "beloved" leader of this country, and why isn't he trying to appease the competing factions with a sense of balance, and calls for calm? Strangely, he chose to visit an old man today instead.

Conspiracy theories abound, however it seems Mr. Ma's concern for the stability of this island couldn't be further from the thoughts that occupy his mind, which appear to be inciting unrest as a means to allow the PRC to provide "assistance". And while on the topic of selling out, what went on last year during the KMT legation's visit to the PRC.

I'm sure I'm not the first to notice this, but doesn't it seem awfully suspicious that the KMT went to China to hob-nob with higher-ups in the PRC, despite the obvious problem, namely they had no official capacity to represent Taiwan in any form since they didn't weren't appointed to do so. What backroom deals were cut during this visit? Who got rich? Under what conditions do the KMT get paid?

I only mention this piece of history, because it seems the return of martial law is imminent, (see above), yet I suspect the answer to my enquiries might be that Mr. Joke and his cronies, have been promised control of this island so long as the PRC gets to claim Taiwan as a "Special Administration District", in much the same way Hong Kong now exists.

Reasons why Chinese poltics suck.

2008-11-03T00:02:00.000-08:00

1) Let's face it, the Taiwanese people haven't had it great since Chiang Kai Shek and his merry minions invaded their island, and as if 40+ years of martial law wasn't bad enough, now they have to put up with the KuoMinDang (KMT - Chinese Nationalist Party) selling their island off piecemeal to the leadership in the PRC. I want to know how much Ma Ing Joke and his cronies have been paid to hand over this place intact to the Chinese.

2) The suspension of civil liberties. Tonight on the evening news, there were several stories covering Taiwanese people attempting excercise their right to free speech by protesting the arrival of Chun Yu-Lin, a low-level PRC diplomat. These stories then showed video of Taiwanese police forcibly removing the protestors from public places, presumably under direct orders from the Central Government. Read Ma Ing Joke. When are the citizens of this country going to stand up en masse and protest these heinous inroads in to their hard earned democracy?

3) Do I live in a democracy or am I trapped in an episode from Video Zonkers? We've all seen them, the bitch slaps, papers being thrown, and general melees that tend to accompany Taiwanese political "debates", but when are the elected representatives in this country going to learn that these antics only earn them derision from the rest of the world, not the respect they so badly claim to want. Let's face it, if, and when, the Taiwanese finally get a seat on the U.N., can you imagine the Taiwanese representative back-handing the PRC delegate? Ok, maybe good for a laugh, and certainly no one would disagree the PRC had it coming, but still.

4) Backhanders, graft and corruption. I'm still not sure if it's the end result of the adage that states, "If power corrupts, then absolute power corrupts absolutely", or whether the legacy from the mainland that followed the Nationalists here, ensured that this centuries old "tradition" continued upon arrival, or perhaps it's a little of both. However, one thing I am sure of is for whatever reason, corruption remains the norm, as the daily English language and Chinese papers will attest. Until this practice is forcibly removed, this country will not enter the world stage.

5) Is this the R.O.C. or the P.R.C? Ah, how this debate tore up the forums on Facebook around the time of the election here in Taiwan. Yet despite this heated discourse, the end result was that a huge chunk of the Taiwanese population ended up voting for Ma Ing Joke, in the blind hope that somehow his election rhetoric would actually translate in to a boost for their personal bottom line. Fast forward eight months, with the economy tanking, unemployment climbing, and civil liberties being eroded, and anyone can see all his words were just that. Who wudda thunk it? Well, me for one, but I guess that doesn't mean that much coming from a Waigaren.

6) Apathy. In much the same way the Republicans mobilised the 80 million strong Evangelical Christian voting bloc in the U.S., by scaring them in to action over non-existant issues regarding gay marriage and abortion, Ma Ing Joke, spurred two-thirds of the Taiwanese in to action by appealing to their wallets. (See above). Sadly, since being proven to be an absolute liar, very few people here have had the "minerals" to stand up and take action. Forshame Taiwan! I firmly believe this inaction has given Mr. Joke a sense that he can now act as he pleases, which has only strengthened his resolve to get rich as quickly as possible by selling this island to the PRC.

7) Riddle me this Riddler. How can someone being your friend when they have 1000+ missles pointed at you? And how about this one, since the PRC doesn't recognise Taiwan as a country, how can a low-level diplomat visit a "country" which doesn't exist?

So why does my title say reasons why Chinese politics suck if I'm talking about Taiwan, you may be asking yourself. Since you asked, the reason is simple. China messes with Taiwan every day in every way imaginable, and all this with the tacit blessing of the West. For if democracy in Asian was truly as important as George Bush and the current administration claim, why would the U.S. prop up a Communist/totalitarian state, at the expense of one of the few democracies in Asia?

More to come, when I've turned the telly off and cooled down a bit. After all, isn't sarcasm a dish best served cold?